Disclaimer

Ladies if any of you are offended by the language used in any of the posts we truly apologize. Our goal is to represent men in the most honest way. Therefore, the word choices are presented as an accurate depiction of the terms men use when speaking to each other.

Thanks for your Understanding,
The Mr's

Monday, June 14, 2010

Luxury Lifestyle-Jungle Fever



It was bound to come up

We haven't touched on anything racial yet in our blog but now i feel we'll ease into it with care. Interracial dating is a taboo subject amongst black guys and black women well actually probably between white men and white women also. Since we want to enlighten women on how we think, I feel we should talk about it. This post will be from the black male perspective. We will say some light things and answer some small questions on the matter to prep for the the deeper stuff in the future. Here are just a few questions that black women have asked.



+Why do you go out with white women?


Because white women are women too. They have a booty and tittays just like black women do, so why wouldn't i like that?


+Do you feel like they can fulfill your needs as a black man?

Hell yeah!! When i need some food, what does a black woman do? She cooks (sometimes). White women do too (might be a little bland, but its food nevertheless). When I need to have an intellectual conversation, what does a black woman do, she talks to me. White women do too. You see the pattern.


+Do white women smell like wet dogs when their hair gets wet?


They smell like wet dogs as much as black women smell like chicken. Get it.


+Why cant you find a good black woman?


Why cant i find a good white, or hispanic, or asian woman? Women are women no matter where you are on this planet.


+Don't you feel like a black woman understands you better?


Not at all. There was a white girl i went to school with and we shared a lot of the same experiences growing up. She played sports and i played sports, she liked cartoons and i did too. We got along well. I started dating the black girl from around the corner and she didn't get me at all.


+Are you scared of a strong black woman?


No, and i'm not scared of a strong white woman either.


+How do you feel when you are with a white woman and other black women see you?


Feels fine. Nothing to be ashamed of or to hide. And no, it doesn't make us feel better or that we've got a trophy or we've done better in life. Any woman can be a trophy, black or white or whatever the race may be. A good looking white woman is just as good as a good looking black woman or asian or hispanic, and so on…



I think the moral is that its not racial, Its a personal choice or preference. The gift of choice is one of the greatest gifts God gave us. Being the same race is just a thing that two people have in common such as liking the same kinds of movies or eating the same kind of ice cream. It doesn't make two people completely right for each other or mean that they should be together. Its just a factor in the decision making process. If dating interracially is not YOUR thing, then so be it. But If you like someone you have to give them a fair shot, no matter what. You wouldn't say " i cant go out with him because he doesn't have hazel eyes", so you cant say "he shouldn't go out with her because she's white", same difference!! Well i guess you could say those things, but it would be YOUR personal choice, just don't burden someone else with that choice.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Are you Serious?

Finally, I have arrived. Sorry ladies for the delay. Mr. YES!!!

This next topic is one that will require a lot of your input by the end. It's something that men always have a hard time grasping because for the most part its something we rarely do. Ladies answer this for me, How come we can go to a restaurant and the one time you get a bad meal out of the hundreds of times we've been to this place your thought upon leaving is "I'm never coming back here." How come it is so easy to leave and not have the slightest regret about not returning? Do you know where this is going...??? Yes I'm talking about the dude that is a complete A$$hole but you go back time after time like a FREAKIN...umm... freakin..GOT DAMN IT I don't have a name for it but you know what I mean!!! It pisses me off because the other side to this story is that there is a guy you always come running and crying to after he plays you. I HAVE BEEN THIS GUY!!! And I must say the first 5 times you came to me sobbing and in distress I genuinely felt sorry for you. I gave you honest unbiased advice and it seemed like you were on the path to enlightenment. I have never been more WRONG in all my 34yrs!!! Now I have to be brutally honest because I'm starting to feel like the thing I don't have a name for because I keep listening and comforting you. So let's break this down:

1. Dude gives you good d__k. I understand you are completely weak because to you the sex which you think is love is soooooooooo good. Guess what??? He has this same type of sex with the chic he is really into.
2. He has all the physical attributes. TALL, allow me to digress for a second, WHAT THE FU@K DOES TALL HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING? Are you planning to play basketball with this dude every weekend or something? Do you like being in the movies and instead of laying your head on his shoulder you would prefer his elbow because he is FREAKIN 6'5"!!! Sorry just never understand that but its a quality on quite a few lists. Muscular/In Shape understandable.
3. HE is so funny. This is not completely your fault because humor often makes people comfortable so because of this you are more vulnerable and accepting of a$$hole behavior.
4. You just LOVE him and though you try to break it off you just CAN'T!!!
That is the biggest BULL$H#T EVER!!! The truth is that YOU are really SELFISH!!! YES YOU ARE SELFISH!!! It has nothing to do with the dude and how much you love him. You have painted a picture of the guy that you always wanted and YOU have made this guy into him. So no matter how fu@k#d up he is, you will continue to give him a pass until HE MOVES ON. That's right you will give him a chance no matter what Because you want what you want and It's HIM. When he wants to go, you'll cancel your plans and go. If he doesn't like one of your girlfriends you'll be extra careful not to tell him about when the two of you went out the other night. ARE YOU SERIOUS??? Who is this guy??? You are selfish because you get all the physical on the surface things from him and get all the emotionally comforting nice guy qualities from me. You have the best of both worlds. Well, guess what I'm dumping you!!! Not because I don't care about you but because you would do it to me for HIM and you wouldn't think twice about it just like my favorite restaurant!!!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

CRASH AND BURN!!!

"I CAN'T STAND YOU, HE MAKES ME SO SICK, I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!" These don't seem like the sentiments of a long-lasting romance, more like the last words he/she heard or stated as the gun went off and the neighbors are left bewildered saying "but they seemed so happy." What is it that drives a wedge between a relationship that we initially thought held so much potential and promise? If we both believed we were building something great when it begins to crumble whose to blame? And if we feel the car speeding towards the edge of a cliff will we both try everything possible to stop the oncoming disaster or will we step on the gas in hopes of the fiery end to our misery? The question that needs to be proposed is "How did we get here" For the sake of understanding the points made let "I" represent "men" and "YOU" represent "women". So in the beginning YOU thought that I was sweet, considerate, thoughtful, attentive blah, blah so on and so on. For the most part everything YOU were looking for YOU were confident that I had or had the potential to attain. I thought that you were intelligent, independent, supportive, caring, beautiful etc. These qualities alone were enough to get us through the first year without any major setbacks. In our 2ND yr we faced a few more challenges but for the most part it was smooth sailing. The 3rd year is where things become CRITICAL!!! WE are settled in. WE are both comfortable with each other. WE have grown, had numerous experiences and memories together. So what will put US on the road to DISASTER? In this 3rd year WE will face a challenge. Some problem or adversity will arise that will require both of our full effort and understanding but WE won't pull together and resolve this amicably. I will feel like I gave to much, YOU will feel like I didn't give enough, and ultimately WE will both LOSE. This is where, the previous 2yrs of our relationship was part of our downfall, we didn't have any experiences dealing with characteristics in one another that WE absolutely COULD NOT STAND!!! WE thought that WE loved everything about each other but the truth was WE loved all the good things about US. There were subtle signs of things I/YOU noticed but we didn't address them because YOU/I was the "ONE" and it didn't matter in the long run, so I/YOU thought. But now, I feel like your questions sound more like demands. YOU feel unappreciated and emotionally neglected. I feel like the sex is boring, YOU feel like the sex is just sex. Everything has now become a tug-of-war a power struggle to have things more the way I/YOU like them. Remember those cars we had in driving school back in the day with a set of controls for the instructor? Imagine this car is our relationship we both have steering wheels both have gas pedals and brakes we both have the ability to control where this relationship goes. So if I go left and you're on board with going left YOU don't have to touch the wheel WE simply go left. But if YOU want to go right and I don't want to go right, now we have a problem. However, there is a simple solution to this problem I can let you proceed right and SACRIFICE my want or I can grab my wheel and force it left. But now our car/relationship will be stuck. And this is exactly what happens. I/YOU refuse to sacrifice something that will now hinder our relationship from progressing and running like the well oiled new car it once was. The sacrifice has to be made willingly otherwise it is simply something I/YOU was forced to do and will resent later. WE have to make sure there is balance and the sacrifices don't become one-sided. The car must not constantly go in one direction without regard for the other. If only one person drives all the time there is really no need for the other to be there. Ultimately, WE are in control. WE are the ones to blame if WE start speeding towards the edge of the cliff. WE both have brakes in our car, if something isn't right WE have to stop and address the issue, or we can simply ride it out until we go over the cliff or the car dies!!!!!!!!!!!


Mr. Editor

Monday, March 29, 2010

"Do What You Say"

So as I sit here for the 2nd week in a row waiting for the blog from MR. Yes!!! I began to think about a complaint I here all the time from women about men. "He said we were going to go on a trip here"...."he said he was going to take my car to get an oil change"..."he said we were going to try this new restaurant instead of the stupid place he likes to go to" Ladies you have a LEGITIMATE argument here. Men can become complacent in the relationship and tend to OVERpromise and UNDERdeliver. Yes this is frustrating and annoying but there is a remedy for it. Don't simply give in and go with the "independent woman b.s." and do it yourself. (Independent Woman Bull Sh#t will be explained in a future blog stay tuned) You have to hold him accountable and MAKE him do it. He expects you to meet his expectations and therefore he must meet yours. When you take the "whatever I'll just do it myself approach", not only do you give him an easy way out but you are creating a divide in the relationship because you will feel like you are carrying the load and aren't appreciated. I guarantee that your man appreciates what you do but, if you do everything, its contributing to his laziness. Now there is a fine line between "getting him to do his part" and "NAGGING!!!" If you ask your man to do something don't leave it open-ended give him a timeline such as "could you get this done by Friday" If you ask for something on Tuesday morning and it doesn't have to be done that day, don't ask on Tuesday evening did he do it. Chances are he didn't because it wasn't specified, not to mention we are not "right away movers" like you are. Give him a deadline, check in half-way to the deadline and then follow-up when its supposed to be done. If it's not done don't give him the "well when are you going to do it" in the pissed off tone, this will probably put him on the defensive and cause him to reel of the reasons or excuses that he didn't do it. Simply ask him when does he think he will get to it, and remind him that its something you really need or want. Your results will be much more positive. If this doesnt work well....normally I wouldn't advise this but clearly your man needs a little more motivation in getting the job done. You may have to TAKE AWAY some of his PRIVILEGES if you know what I mean ;) Hope this helps


Mr. Editor

P.S. MR. YES!!!, Where the F is my blog???